Professor Patrick Barry, president of the Eastern Michigan University Alumni Association, told 300 hundred students on Tuesday night in the Student Center Ballroom that they can’t be perfect, but they can be “damn good.”
Barry, from the department of communication, media and theatre arts, was the second speaker in the Star Lecture Series, hosted by The Honors College. He spoke about the pursuit of perfection.
Perfectionism is a common struggle for many Honors students and Barry said he has dealt with it his entire life. He wanted to address these issues and provide advice on how to deal with it.
Barry differentiated between “healthy perfectionism” and “unhealthy perfectionism.”
He asked the students to write down their idea of the perfect place, day and person and to discuss what they wrote with students around them.
Barry asked if any of the students had listed Barbie as his or her perfect person.
“Research shows that for a lot of young girls, Barbie is their first impression of what perfect should look like,” Barry said. “Perfectionism is not only applied to schoolwork and careers, but our body image as well. Unhealthy perfectionism could lead to chronic anxiety, depression, OCD and eating disorders.”
He said perfection is idealized.
“Everyone’s definition of perfection is different,” Barry said. “As a society, we tend to idolize celebrities and aim to be similar to them. But each time a celebrity has a scandal or receives bad press, we realize that ‘these perfect people really aren’t perfect.’”
Barry said that while people experience perfect acts and moments, those acts and moments might not be there all the time.
“There are a lot of mixed messages of perfection in our society,” he said. “We’ve all heard the saying ‘Practice makes perfect.’ And then people say, ‘no, it’s not practice that makes perfect, it’s perfect practice makes perfect.’”
He said his favorite quote is from Homer Simpson: “No one is perfect. That is why pencils have erasers.”
Barry gave the audience tips to deal with perfectionism:
Be the authentic you.
Ask for help.
Collaborate and cooperate.
Take calculated risks.
Set priorities.
Cultivate calm and patience.
Change up your routine.
Give yourself permission to make mistakes at times.
Strive for excellence instead of perfection.
Reem Yassine, a freshman international affairs major, said she thought the presentation helped her a lot.
“As a freshman, you come in with all these expectations,” Yassine said. “You want to maintain or do better than you did in high school and you put a lot of pressure on yourself. So this presentation actually helped out a lot.”
Ryan Hayley, a freshman secondary education major, said he realized he doesn’t have to please others, just himself.
“Be perfect to yourself,” Hayley said.
Barry is an EMU alumnus and has taught for 44 years, 11 of which have been at EMU.
The Star Lecture Series has four more lectures this year. John Feldkamp, the associate director at The Honors College, will give the next one on Dec. 1. These lectures count for LBC credit and an Honors requirement.
